We’ve all seen the headlines telling us it takes 21 days to form a habit….

If that were anywhere close to true we would all be living our healthiest lives and masters at whatever our hearts desired. 

Anyone can follow through on something for 21 days. Hell, I’ve seen people embark on 90-day fitness challenges, show up to all the fitness classes, follow the recipe book to a T, make great connections in the classes, and even get great results from the program. 

Yet the minute the challenge ends the majority of the successful participants revert back to old habits. Maybe not right away, but eventually they return to the dark side.

So, NO, you’re not broken if a new habit like working out or eating healthy hasn’t “stuck” after 21 days. 

It’s the whole 21-day habit thing that’s a scam. It’s an unrealistic claim designed to keep you on the eternal hamster wheel of fad diets and fitness trends, in search of the one that actually will stick.

So how long does it really take to build a habit? Well, first we must consider…

The DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A HABIT AND A ROUTINE

Habits are actions executed regularly with little thought. It’s done on impulse, you feel uncomfortable when you don’t perform your habit. You instinctively make time for a habit. It’s something that has become automatic.

Not to be confused with a “routine”. These are actions that are repeated regularly (especially in a specific order) that usually require conscious thought and intentional effort to perform.

In short, all habits are routines but not all routines are habits. 

YOU PROBABLY JUST BUILT A ROUTINE

After 21 days you may be able to say you’ve built a routine for yourself but you probably didn’t build a habit. 

Even if you enjoy your routine and see the benefits it will take time for habit roots to grow. Until then you remain at the mercy of falling back on behaviors that actually ARE your habits. 

Sometimes we’ve been performing a routine for so long that we feel confident in maintaining it, and so we mentally “slack off”.

Meaning, we aren’t as intentional at making sure it gets done. Don’t make that mistake! It’s too easy to miss one day, then two, then another. The next thing you know six months have passed and you’re back at square one trying to reinstate the same routines you were once performing. 

That’s why you must be vigilant and intentional about performing a new behavior long after it’s become “routine”.  

SO…HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO BUILD A HABIT?!?

Well it depends on the difficulty of the new behaviour. Flossing your teeth is likely a much easier habit to create than it is to stick to a new diet plan and exercise regime.

It also depends on each individual’s mindset, if they have experience with performing the habit in the past. But with my clients who have never really had healthy habits it can take a year (or more) for their new healthy lifestyles to become a habit.

I hope that didn’t discourage you. It’s actually a bargain if you consider the amount of time you’ve invested into bad habits. And if you build the habit correctly it will stick much better and probably faster. 

I want to note that while it may take months to a year for certain activities to become a habit, it doesn’t mean performing the habit doesn’t get easier. It’s actually the easy feeling that may trick us into believing we have created a habit, when it fact it’s still just at the stage of being a routine.

THINGS TO CONSIDER WHEN BUILDING NEW HABITS

Many of us fantasize about being that person who can get up at the crack of dawn effortlessly and go jogging. We don’t want to just be able to easily make healthy eating choices throughout our day, we want the right choice to be *second nature*. We want meditation to feel like a breeze.  

Okay so these may not be your exact goals but you know what I’m trying to say.  We all have ideals in our heads of who we would like to be and we want living our ideal self to be easy. But anything worth having usually takes effort so I suggest you embody this famous quote:

“Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one”

― Bruce Lee

SERIOUSLY HOW CAN WE MAKE ADOPTING NEW HABITS EASIER?

There are so many variables involved in how fast we can turn a routine into a habit. Some of them include: 

• Natural ability – everyone has the potential to learn anything with the desire and consistent practice. But often we have a talent that we are naturally gifted at, that we can excel at quickly when the talent is nurtured. This helps make something stick because we progress quickly. The positive emotions that come with doing something well can help a new habit stick.
  
• Your desire to learn. If you’re being forced to do something you don’t actually want to do, your resistance to it will be more prominent and will mess with your ability to make it a habit.  So it would benefit you greatly to find activities that you actually enjoy doing that will get you to your goal.
  
• Mindset is a huge factor as well. We block the ability to turn something into a habit if we are impatient to achieve the goal and focus too much on the external reward rather than being invested in the journey. If we think negatively about the activities we want to turn into habits it likely will never become one. If we are hard on ourselves regarding our progress, it can affect how long something becomes a habit as well.
  
• Make sure foundation habits are good: The quality of our sleep, nutrition, and stress management and nutrition will affect the part of your brain responsible for executive function. That’s the part of your brain that allows you to set goals, plan for the future, decision-making, and taking action now that will only give us rewards in the future. Ever notice when you’re tired all your good intentions for healthy habits go out the window? It’s because your brain is literally too exhausted to help you do the right thing.
  
  ONE MORE PIECE OF ADVICE FOR GETTING HABITS TO STICK

Stop being in a hurry to achieve. Enjoy the journey and how you are changing and growing in the process. There are going to be plateaus, there are going to be days where it feels challenging to follow through, it’s best you acknowledge that and accept it up front, and remind yourself that all of it is a normal part of a any success story and totally OKAY!

Be easy on yourself, be forgiving of yourself, and simply commit to picking up and getting back on the horse ASAP when you experience a setback (and you WILL experience setbacks along the way).

I HOPE THAT THIS ARTICLE HAS HELPED BY:

•  Affirming that you are not broken just because a new habit you are trying to adopt does not feel like a habit or easy after only 21 days, 60 days, or even 90 days.  
  
• Confirming that you should be prepared to spend a good amount of time in the “routine” phase” of building a new habit.
  
• Reminding you that setbacks, challenges and feelings of resistance are a normal part of new habit formation.
  
• Informing you  that you actually achieve faster when you are dedicated to the process (present moment) rather than “wishing” things were already easy, or achieved (future)
  
• Understanding that upgrading your sleep and stress management will greatly assist in making new actions feel easier.