Supressing uncomfortable emotions blocks your ability to reach your potential. It stops you from reaching your goals, and the more you do it the worse you will feel in the long run because those undealt with emotions will continue to return with more intensity over time.
As I mentioned in a previous post, the journey towards your dreams is about getting comfortable with discomfort. Therefore it’s simple, if you run from that discomfort then you won’t reach your goals. You can not get to where you want to be by being, doing and acting in the same way that got you where you are now. It will most definitely require change. And change is uncomfortable. At times, even when you LIKE and clearly see the benefits of the changes in your life you can still feel resistance as old habits try their best to push their way back into your life. But the discomfort is where growth is. You must lean into it and not run from it.
In the case of building a healthy lifestyle, such as starting a new running routine, or changing your eating habits, writing in your journal daily. Or in my case creating content to help myself and others lead their best healthy lives. You may feel anxiety towards taking action, or you may be so used to the feeling that you can’t name it. It may not really FEEL like anything at all, but it shows in your actions.
So, I’m going to give you 3 ways to identify if you may be supressing uncomfortable emotions, and in my next article I will give you strategies on how to lean into those uncomfortable emotions instead.
- Making up excuses for not doing things that are important to you. If you have been saying you should start going to the gym, or you should get a training coach, or you should change your eating habits or you should start a yoga practice but you haven’t because: You don’t have the time, or the money, or you’re too tired or you’re not motivated (or insert any other excuse here) then it’s time to look inward and see what you are really running from? Are you trying to avoid the uncomfortable feeling of lack of self confidence in your ability to actually follow through yet again? Are you trying to avoid the fear associated with making changes in your life? So you just don’t think about it and pretend that you actually have valid excuses for not making your health a priority?
- Always looking for instant gratification. Do you binge eat, go for the wine and Netflix or hit the blunt and nap a lot when things get the slightest bit uncomfortable? Like when you think about your goals and how much work it will take to get there but realize you HAVEN’T been doing those things. Or when you feel “bored” but know you have no reason to feel this way because there is actually a million things you could be doing to work on bettering yourself. That’s your body and brain looking for quick and easy hits of dopamine to distract you from your feelings of discomfort for not honouring what you know is important to you.
- Blaming your kids for not starting or sticking to your health journey. This one could also fall under making up excuses but I felt that it warranted it’s own point because I see this all to often. People who have their kids in 5 different after school activities, and play dates and continue to baby them long after the kids are capable of doing things for themselves such as make their own lunches or cleaning their rooms. Their kids becomes a convenient excuse for never being able to make their own health a priority. First of all you set the example for your kids, they do what they see and no what they are told. So no matter how many sports you have them in when they are young, if you model poor health habits they are more than likely going to follow in your footsteps as they grow up. Also, you can not pour from an empty cup so you need to make sure you are running on all four cylinders so you can give your kids the best of you. That means making sure you are well rested, well fed and well exercised. Not to mention it’s simply not fair to put your desire to run from the challenge of maintaining a healthy lifestyle on their heads.
In my own case I am known to seek instant gratification in the form of checking social media and reacting to every notification immediately when I am working on creating content. Especially video content, because its a new and challenging activity for me. Which is why I no longer run from that discomfort, I become self-aware and I lean into it and I have created implementation intentions regarding this habit so that I can be more productive and build more confidence.
What uncomfortable emotions have you been supressing with some type of crutch such as distractions, your kids or instant gratification?
